lebedev
"If a thousand people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing."
patriotism
Tags: 
patriotism
patriotismyou know that complex in which hostages begin to sympathize with and care for their captors? that is patriotism.
"MAN WILL NEVER BE FREE UNTIL THE LAST KING IS STRANGLED WITH THE ENTRAILS OF THE LAST PRIEST."
-- Denis Diderot
ha! that's what i call a tattoo-worthy quote... the truth is almost always funny, as the french are wont to remind us.
-- Denis Diderot
ha! that's what i call a tattoo-worthy quote... the truth is almost always funny, as the french are wont to remind us.
might vs right: a random wall of words inspired by a little jj rousseau
civilization makes us poofters... makes us weaker as individuals yet
stronger as groups... or is that perceived strength just an illusion? are
not groups more fragile than strong individuals? what is more useful--
strength or knowledge? individuals build strength, groups build
knowledge... what is easier to acquire-- strength or knowledge? in the
"natural world" knowledge is more elusive than strength, and vice-versa in
the "civilized world"... perhaps wherever "might is right" prevails, nature
prevails, and this "civilized world" of which we so often speak and dream is
but a theory... for would not a truly civil world follow the maxim "right
is right" above the alternative? why should the "wise" bow to might?
wisdom should elevate us above fear... wisdom should equip us with the
tools to negate physical might... tools that transcend might... tools that
CONVINCE rather than dominate... tools that ENLIGHTEN rather than
terrorize... where are these tools? why aren't they working? might is the
easy way, the natural way... it is our default tool, our inherited master,
our first and last resort... right must be AGREED upon, but might is as
uncontestable as an avalanche... right demands co-operation, might demands
submission... right must constantly be revised and challenged, but to
challenge and change might is to make a fire burn cold... right is reason,
might is muscle... right harvests the virtues of all, might harvests the
fear and obedience of all to serve the virtues of one... right is the
domain of all, might, of a few... nature taught us to be mighty, to wield
might like a talisman against all unpleasantness... we know what it is to
be mighty, for we feast on the less-mighty every night, and hold a knife to
the throats of the less-mighty every second of every day... if our might as
a species is ever challenged, we get to task eradicating the source of that
challenge... bears are not civilized, wolves are not civilized, sharks are
not civilized... "civilization" is the domain of humankind and those who
never fail in the service of humankind... we eradicate the competition, and
then we turn on each other... when there are no bears and wolves afoot
within the city gates, we project their spectre onto the faces of each
other... we are meant to live alongside such adversaries, and our genetic
conditioning creates them when we isolate ourselves from them (or eradicate
them)... we are/become wolves at each others' doors... our genes must be
telling us that we need wolves to avoid becoming weak... what good is a
might that can never affect? what good is might when there is nothing to
effect? might is divisive... might is delusional, always inventing
threats, always subjecting us to fear so that we may seek out strength...
we need strength no more! we are all that's left to feel the brunt of our
strength! we are all that is left to suffer from might!
the bears are gone! the wolves are gone! the sharks are gone! the plague is gone! we killed them all because we feared them! now all we fear is each other-- what do you think we will do to ourselves! might will lead us to ruin, not victory-- IT is all we need fear. IT is the last and most formidable beast of this world... it is our greatest threat... fear it, and the fear with which it contorts us into beasts... might is the enemy of civilization, the enemy of right, and only righteousness can beat it... this is not abstract! education can prevail over might as laws (ideally) prevail over chaos... we are NEVER taught the follies of might-- never! we are simply taught of the scar that might has left, and is leaving, on our world... we're taught the wheres whens, whos and hows of might and that is all! and that is insanity! "this conqueror had an army of this many and killed this many people to gain an empire of this many nations..." "this mogul began with a bank account of this many dollars and bought out this many companies to gain a corporation which spans this many continents..." MIGHT. it is a wretched, wretched thing, but it can be defeated by three humble letters: "w", "h", and "y". might cannot stand up to questioning and logic... it is irreconcilable with our better virtues... might's strength rests on the assumption that all life will use might whenever it comes across anything that can be swayed by it... might's strength rests on the assumption that all life is selfish to a fault, that all life is selfish first and foremost... is this the case? if so, life is invirtuous, and not worth fretting over at all.. if not, WE HAVE TO CHANGE NOW. right is right.
we each define words for ourselves...
and the more we hear words and the more we see them, the clearer those definitions become... sure we largely use others' definitions to influence and define ours', but we pick and choose whose definitions we believe... we need to better define words... we need to teach immutable definitions to these words we use so immutably, so irretractably...
perhaps there are too many words... perhaps there is too little instruction... too many are too intimidated by the scope of words... by their sheer numbers... a comprehensive knowledge of words seems only for the "elite"... the geeks... the scientists... the privileged few... the gifted few... but we all have comparable brains... we are all gifted...
everyone should have an understanding of every word at their disposal... every word in their arsenal... to not be aware of such things is a crime. words are the most important and useful things we can know. they define us... and we define them...
we evolved from wordless beasts... we have become wordful beasts... and until we evolve into uber-zen-enlightened-guru-mofos, we will need our words... we must learn to interpret our symbols better... a red light should be as a brick wall... the word "love" should be as a mountain... or an ocean... we must learn to relate each word to a feeling... a unique feeling, but a shared one...
we totally miss the mark with our words... as symbols we misinterpret them because there is no uniform, clear interpretation... as tools we misuse them out of an ignorance in ways to maximize their efficiency... it is like possessing a great wealth but having nothing to spend it on... we need to share the wealth... the few who have it must share it constantly... how can someone spend fifteen years in a "school" and come out of it talking like a fucking idiot? our "schools" are broken... our "societies" are broken... our "civilization" is broken... but words can fix them all...
words are not hollow, unimpressive, intangible things-- when they are sincere... but we must mutually understand the meaning of sincerity before we can come to practise it with each other... we must understand what we are doing in order to act efficiently... words lead to comprehesion (in tribes such as ours'-- maybe not so much on individual levels...) and words express comprehension... the understanding of words should be passed down and augmented through the generations... like electricity, steel-- things like that... instead words just breed more words while peoples' understanding of them remains constantly stunted... literacy rates are misleading... most people scrape by with a handful of words... how can we express the calleidoscope of thoughts in our mad, mad brains with a handful of words??
it’s like trying to portray a world of colour in black and white... it’s like trying to play a game of soccer with a stone... it's like trying to fuck with your pants on... those are words we can all understand, no doubt.
and the more we hear words and the more we see them, the clearer those definitions become... sure we largely use others' definitions to influence and define ours', but we pick and choose whose definitions we believe... we need to better define words... we need to teach immutable definitions to these words we use so immutably, so irretractably...
perhaps there are too many words... perhaps there is too little instruction... too many are too intimidated by the scope of words... by their sheer numbers... a comprehensive knowledge of words seems only for the "elite"... the geeks... the scientists... the privileged few... the gifted few... but we all have comparable brains... we are all gifted...
everyone should have an understanding of every word at their disposal... every word in their arsenal... to not be aware of such things is a crime. words are the most important and useful things we can know. they define us... and we define them...
we evolved from wordless beasts... we have become wordful beasts... and until we evolve into uber-zen-enlightened-guru-mofos, we will need our words... we must learn to interpret our symbols better... a red light should be as a brick wall... the word "love" should be as a mountain... or an ocean... we must learn to relate each word to a feeling... a unique feeling, but a shared one...
we totally miss the mark with our words... as symbols we misinterpret them because there is no uniform, clear interpretation... as tools we misuse them out of an ignorance in ways to maximize their efficiency... it is like possessing a great wealth but having nothing to spend it on... we need to share the wealth... the few who have it must share it constantly... how can someone spend fifteen years in a "school" and come out of it talking like a fucking idiot? our "schools" are broken... our "societies" are broken... our "civilization" is broken... but words can fix them all...
words are not hollow, unimpressive, intangible things-- when they are sincere... but we must mutually understand the meaning of sincerity before we can come to practise it with each other... we must understand what we are doing in order to act efficiently... words lead to comprehesion (in tribes such as ours'-- maybe not so much on individual levels...) and words express comprehension... the understanding of words should be passed down and augmented through the generations... like electricity, steel-- things like that... instead words just breed more words while peoples' understanding of them remains constantly stunted... literacy rates are misleading... most people scrape by with a handful of words... how can we express the calleidoscope of thoughts in our mad, mad brains with a handful of words??
it’s like trying to portray a world of colour in black and white... it’s like trying to play a game of soccer with a stone... it's like trying to fuck with your pants on... those are words we can all understand, no doubt.
a little politics
legend for yankees:
pm (prime minister) = president
mp (member of parliament) = representative (i'm pretty sure)
there should be no parties in politics... every individual politician should be held accountable for their own actions and inactions and their purported principles... the best MPs would be free and better able to distinguish themselves from the rest-- as great leaders in one department or another... and once their passions have been proven, the people could vote for whoever they deem to be the best... voters should never have to have ulterior motives... no parties-- just people.
hmmm... should only MPs be eligible for the prime-ministry? and should the person with the second highest number of votes be the deputy pm? or should persons 2-6 form some elite sub-priministerial comittee that oversees the delegation of duties in federal government (eg: minister of agriculture) under the pm's guidance... i wonder what the senate does? maybe it's time to drop it... or do i sound like some redneck saying "i wonder what vitamin C does... ah fuck it i don't need it.."?
there should be no campaign donations at all... anyone running for pm should get equal and totally free airtime on all canadian tv and radio stations... they would each have a website on which, amongst other information, they would have to display their answers to a fixed number of poignant, "every-day" style questions posed by random canadians and chosen by randomly chosen canadians, as well as some posed by professors, doctors, writers and the like (and every candidate would have to answer the same questions, in case i didn't make that clear)... they would also have to state their guiding principles, and a synopsis of their views on the top 20 issues in the country (healthcare, immigration, nature, etc)...
sure, if this was the case the people could get duped by a smooth-talking suave diabolical madman, but a) there would have to be a system in place to hold him or her accountable for their actions, to the last detail, and b) the media would have to start spewing substance instead of this beastly, pretentious trash that passes for news... a common argument would be that individuals are too easy to corrupt, but i contend that members of parties corrupt each other's common sense and common sense of decency. plus they inhibit impassioned mps from standing alone and championing a certain cause that needs a champion and just not the validation of some discredited party...
anyone should be allowed to run for mp (let's say there should be a small administrative fee of some kind, somewhere in the neighbourhood of $300 - $600)... rich people would have an obvious advantage, having more free time and resources, but this could be lessened by making it the law that each person who runs can only have a campaign "staff" of 4 people, and they have to wear badges when they go knocking on doors etc, and make a log of all their hours spent on the campaign briefly describing exactly what they were doing and how much $$ they spent... there should be a cap on $$, and surprise audits for suspiciously outlandish campaigns...
but what about the guys who hold the pm and all government accountable? there should be a legion of (this is where it gets tricky...) highly distinguished individuals (eg: stephen lewis, david suzuki, margaret atwood... (but make sure there is always some youthful vigour in there...)), who are willing to undertake such a responsibility, who are placed in charge, communally, of the ministry of accountability, and would have access to all the public and private information on canada's leaders, and would follow their day-to-day activities using lots of neat technology... they'd have jurisdiction over any canadian law enforcement agency, and could even employ law enforcement officers of their choice and put them to any task... the main job of this ministry would be to make sure the politicians are doing what they say they're doing. and every pm should have to write a weekly blog to the people, letting them know what's going on, etc (and so should every member of the legion of accountability and every minister and mp and really, every government employee...)...
pm (prime minister) = president
mp (member of parliament) = representative (i'm pretty sure)
there should be no parties in politics... every individual politician should be held accountable for their own actions and inactions and their purported principles... the best MPs would be free and better able to distinguish themselves from the rest-- as great leaders in one department or another... and once their passions have been proven, the people could vote for whoever they deem to be the best... voters should never have to have ulterior motives... no parties-- just people.
hmmm... should only MPs be eligible for the prime-ministry? and should the person with the second highest number of votes be the deputy pm? or should persons 2-6 form some elite sub-priministerial comittee that oversees the delegation of duties in federal government (eg: minister of agriculture) under the pm's guidance... i wonder what the senate does? maybe it's time to drop it... or do i sound like some redneck saying "i wonder what vitamin C does... ah fuck it i don't need it.."?
there should be no campaign donations at all... anyone running for pm should get equal and totally free airtime on all canadian tv and radio stations... they would each have a website on which, amongst other information, they would have to display their answers to a fixed number of poignant, "every-day" style questions posed by random canadians and chosen by randomly chosen canadians, as well as some posed by professors, doctors, writers and the like (and every candidate would have to answer the same questions, in case i didn't make that clear)... they would also have to state their guiding principles, and a synopsis of their views on the top 20 issues in the country (healthcare, immigration, nature, etc)...
sure, if this was the case the people could get duped by a smooth-talking suave diabolical madman, but a) there would have to be a system in place to hold him or her accountable for their actions, to the last detail, and b) the media would have to start spewing substance instead of this beastly, pretentious trash that passes for news... a common argument would be that individuals are too easy to corrupt, but i contend that members of parties corrupt each other's common sense and common sense of decency. plus they inhibit impassioned mps from standing alone and championing a certain cause that needs a champion and just not the validation of some discredited party...
anyone should be allowed to run for mp (let's say there should be a small administrative fee of some kind, somewhere in the neighbourhood of $300 - $600)... rich people would have an obvious advantage, having more free time and resources, but this could be lessened by making it the law that each person who runs can only have a campaign "staff" of 4 people, and they have to wear badges when they go knocking on doors etc, and make a log of all their hours spent on the campaign briefly describing exactly what they were doing and how much $$ they spent... there should be a cap on $$, and surprise audits for suspiciously outlandish campaigns...
but what about the guys who hold the pm and all government accountable? there should be a legion of (this is where it gets tricky...) highly distinguished individuals (eg: stephen lewis, david suzuki, margaret atwood... (but make sure there is always some youthful vigour in there...)), who are willing to undertake such a responsibility, who are placed in charge, communally, of the ministry of accountability, and would have access to all the public and private information on canada's leaders, and would follow their day-to-day activities using lots of neat technology... they'd have jurisdiction over any canadian law enforcement agency, and could even employ law enforcement officers of their choice and put them to any task... the main job of this ministry would be to make sure the politicians are doing what they say they're doing. and every pm should have to write a weekly blog to the people, letting them know what's going on, etc (and so should every member of the legion of accountability and every minister and mp and really, every government employee...)...
don't read this-- that was not reverse psychology
communication... a two-way street... a double-edged sword... etc... expression is half the battle... comprehension is the other half... good luck with that shit y'all...
sometimes i feel like i know everything... everything, that is, that doesn't require any specialization or expertise whatsoever... everything to do with people... life even... people and life are full of surprises however, as any half-apt observer will note... the future is way out of my league, obviously, though probabilities are doable... like, for example, the fact that the above statement will lead most who read this to a number of dubious assumptions... take note of the words though, people, i pick and choose them carefully (ie: "sometimes")... anyhow, moving right along... there's this thing about people that's been chafing my brain recently (and by recently, i mean for several years now)...
people-- everyone i know in one way or another-- disappoint the hell out of me. have i griped of this already? if so, it is worthy of another... there is not a single member of my family, a single friend past or present, or even a potential idol of mine (Neil, Fyodor, etc) who has not disappointed me massively and consistently (inconsistency, from a moral standpoint, disappoints me a great deal, for one...)... i couldn't find a fucking idol to save my life (not in the ranks of humans at least)... i've tried, i guess, i've felt the roots of human-invoked awe and reverence, but NOTHING is eternal... i can't even find an acceptable role model out there... not that i feel i need one, fiction serves me well enough, but the children, the little poofters, surely they need someone, something to look up to, don't they? (maybe not...) the best i can do is piece together some imaginary virtuous person out of the bits of virtue that all of us have... my buddy Dwch is wholly, innately honest... my compadre Asshat is selfless... my friend Hertzbag is earnest... blah blah blah capiche? take any group of people, put their good bits together, and you have yourself something decent... take any one person, observe and analyze that person, and you will come to observe a dwch... is the embodiment of virtue, the human of virtue, a myth? it appears to be so... fuckin douche-bags, all of us... i don't expect perfection, just consistent common courtesy and common sense... show me that in human form and i'll eat a fucking hat....
it IS easier to love those you don't really know all that well, or see with a great deal of frequency... I've never met someone who doesn't eventually make me nauseous, in one regard or another, just as i've never met someone who doesn't evoke some reverence and love in one way or another (ahhh, go the foggy minds, so he isn't just cold and bitter-- he bleeds! he loves! of course i fucking do... all anger comes from love, and nauseousness doesn't equate to hate (though it can come close))... sometimes i think love is just nature's way of keeping us interested , fueling our will to live and our drive to kill, conquer, and consume (oooh, that's like, so gloomy... suck a dick)... every crime is a love crime... love is the ultimate excuse, the ultimate justification for being stupid dwches (pronounced "douches" btw-- don't ask)... think about it.
we are tribal beasts, but ideally we live in huge fucking tribes so we don't all have to see each other every time the sun's a blazing... the spaces between us bring us closer together, i'd say... there's one for those Hallmark cocksuckers... someone asked me awhile back if i'd rather live by the ocean or in the mountains... i said the mountains cause there're fewer fucking people there... do people remind me of my own shortcomings? sure, sure... but they also feel compelled to frequently remind me of their own... i don't have time for that... doting on such things would be like soo super gloomy...
humanity needs some fucking standards... a code of conduct of sorts... all this pleading ignorance is driving me nuts... ignorance of common sense is no defense... how is virtue taught/learned? we each teach it to ourselves, with careful consideration, with knowing thyself so as to know each other... with humble, sincere, reflection, and with a little lack of regard/reverence for the self... and fuck time... if it takes you eighty years to learn one worthy thing, take eighty fucking years... our emphasis on timeliness arose out of selfishness... we each want to do it all, live it all, feel it all, breathe it all... and we want it NOW... we each want more than each other, or at least as much as we can chew... but the all is everywhere, in everything... ah fuck, i went and got hungry, and doubt and grumpiness always grip me when i'm hungry... but doubt is fucking good, people, indulge in it some more, please... i doubt whether or not anyone will read this... i doubt whether or not anyone will "get" where i'm coming from... i doubt that any of this is in any way novel to anyone... i doubt if there is any point at all in writing such things, i just know that doing it makes me less angry at the end of the day... anger is a gift? ha-ha
ps: i've recently concluded that nature as we know/knew it is a total write-off... i will write of that and other fabulous and fantastical things later, assuming i can once again bring myself to stomach my own tripe...
sometimes i feel like i know everything... everything, that is, that doesn't require any specialization or expertise whatsoever... everything to do with people... life even... people and life are full of surprises however, as any half-apt observer will note... the future is way out of my league, obviously, though probabilities are doable... like, for example, the fact that the above statement will lead most who read this to a number of dubious assumptions... take note of the words though, people, i pick and choose them carefully (ie: "sometimes")... anyhow, moving right along... there's this thing about people that's been chafing my brain recently (and by recently, i mean for several years now)...
people-- everyone i know in one way or another-- disappoint the hell out of me. have i griped of this already? if so, it is worthy of another... there is not a single member of my family, a single friend past or present, or even a potential idol of mine (Neil, Fyodor, etc) who has not disappointed me massively and consistently (inconsistency, from a moral standpoint, disappoints me a great deal, for one...)... i couldn't find a fucking idol to save my life (not in the ranks of humans at least)... i've tried, i guess, i've felt the roots of human-invoked awe and reverence, but NOTHING is eternal... i can't even find an acceptable role model out there... not that i feel i need one, fiction serves me well enough, but the children, the little poofters, surely they need someone, something to look up to, don't they? (maybe not...) the best i can do is piece together some imaginary virtuous person out of the bits of virtue that all of us have... my buddy Dwch is wholly, innately honest... my compadre Asshat is selfless... my friend Hertzbag is earnest... blah blah blah capiche? take any group of people, put their good bits together, and you have yourself something decent... take any one person, observe and analyze that person, and you will come to observe a dwch... is the embodiment of virtue, the human of virtue, a myth? it appears to be so... fuckin douche-bags, all of us... i don't expect perfection, just consistent common courtesy and common sense... show me that in human form and i'll eat a fucking hat....
it IS easier to love those you don't really know all that well, or see with a great deal of frequency... I've never met someone who doesn't eventually make me nauseous, in one regard or another, just as i've never met someone who doesn't evoke some reverence and love in one way or another (ahhh, go the foggy minds, so he isn't just cold and bitter-- he bleeds! he loves! of course i fucking do... all anger comes from love, and nauseousness doesn't equate to hate (though it can come close))... sometimes i think love is just nature's way of keeping us interested , fueling our will to live and our drive to kill, conquer, and consume (oooh, that's like, so gloomy... suck a dick)... every crime is a love crime... love is the ultimate excuse, the ultimate justification for being stupid dwches (pronounced "douches" btw-- don't ask)... think about it.
we are tribal beasts, but ideally we live in huge fucking tribes so we don't all have to see each other every time the sun's a blazing... the spaces between us bring us closer together, i'd say... there's one for those Hallmark cocksuckers... someone asked me awhile back if i'd rather live by the ocean or in the mountains... i said the mountains cause there're fewer fucking people there... do people remind me of my own shortcomings? sure, sure... but they also feel compelled to frequently remind me of their own... i don't have time for that... doting on such things would be like soo super gloomy...
humanity needs some fucking standards... a code of conduct of sorts... all this pleading ignorance is driving me nuts... ignorance of common sense is no defense... how is virtue taught/learned? we each teach it to ourselves, with careful consideration, with knowing thyself so as to know each other... with humble, sincere, reflection, and with a little lack of regard/reverence for the self... and fuck time... if it takes you eighty years to learn one worthy thing, take eighty fucking years... our emphasis on timeliness arose out of selfishness... we each want to do it all, live it all, feel it all, breathe it all... and we want it NOW... we each want more than each other, or at least as much as we can chew... but the all is everywhere, in everything... ah fuck, i went and got hungry, and doubt and grumpiness always grip me when i'm hungry... but doubt is fucking good, people, indulge in it some more, please... i doubt whether or not anyone will read this... i doubt whether or not anyone will "get" where i'm coming from... i doubt that any of this is in any way novel to anyone... i doubt if there is any point at all in writing such things, i just know that doing it makes me less angry at the end of the day... anger is a gift? ha-ha
ps: i've recently concluded that nature as we know/knew it is a total write-off... i will write of that and other fabulous and fantastical things later, assuming i can once again bring myself to stomach my own tripe...
why not?
jose marti once said: "I am a sincere man, from the land of palm trees, and before I die, I wish to bare my soul of these verses..." so, it was in such a spirit that i went and blogged some old bukowski-inspired poems (yes, it was also in the "i don't give a fuck" spirit of the beat-niks)... some of them are good, some are truly shit-- i bet you can't tell which is which, and really it doesn't matter, as long as they make you scratch your head like the dressed-up monkies we all are... jose marti also said: "In the benevolence of men's souls I find the root of my affection for their suffering, and my just desire to eliminate it." Just thought I'd leave you with something worth hearing... cheers, amigos
that's the last of them... amen... blame bukowski
nameless
call god what you want
i'm guessing it doesn't care
would you be upset
if someone called you jeff
when in fact your name was henry?
i guess it depends on
how
they call you jeff
as long as there
was no malice behind it
you probably wouldn't mind
but then again
you aren't exactly god are you?
who knows how short his fuse is
you call god many names
man-made all of them
when the obvious thing to do
would be to ask it
but we both know
you are afraid
that it
wouldn't answer you
i would assume
god has much better things to do
just because you name something
and catalogue something
doesn't mean
you understand
anything
name what you understand
observe what you do not
call god what you want
i'm guessing it doesn't care
would you be upset
if someone called you jeff
when in fact your name was henry?
i guess it depends on
how
they call you jeff
as long as there
was no malice behind it
you probably wouldn't mind
but then again
you aren't exactly god are you?
who knows how short his fuse is
you call god many names
man-made all of them
when the obvious thing to do
would be to ask it
but we both know
you are afraid
that it
wouldn't answer you
i would assume
god has much better things to do
just because you name something
and catalogue something
doesn't mean
you understand
anything
name what you understand
observe what you do not
sometimes
RIGHT after i wake up
i forget who i am
for a moment
i look around
i'm in a building
i'm in a room
i see a guitar
oh, right
i play guitar
excellent
oh, right
i have a name
i have a life going here
i have habits and customs
i have a way
i have emotions to choose from
i have a lot to choose from
i have obligations
i have needs
for the time being
every morning
can be a rebirth
every day
can be different
any moment
i can change
i can choose
that's fucking freedom folks
RIGHT after i wake up
i forget who i am
for a moment
i look around
i'm in a building
i'm in a room
i see a guitar
oh, right
i play guitar
excellent
oh, right
i have a name
i have a life going here
i have habits and customs
i have a way
i have emotions to choose from
i have a lot to choose from
i have obligations
i have needs
for the time being
every morning
can be a rebirth
every day
can be different
any moment
i can change
i can choose
that's fucking freedom folks
No replies - reply
today
i am afraid
to go to sleep
having accomplished nothing of consequence
today
for a while when i was a kid
i was afraid
to go to sleep
to let the day end
because i heard
that every day
another species
of plant or animal
goes extinct
on our planet
due to us
every day
i have lived
i have been complicit
in the destruction
in the murder death killing
of beings that i love
beings that time loved
and lost
when did our paradise
become a prison?
i was an impotent witness
as a child
and as a man
i am an impotent accomplice
i am afraid
to go to sleep
having accomplished nothing of consequence
today
i am growing tired
but if i give in
my daily consumption
will not have contributed
to anything worth counting
all i did today
was consume
our lives
are so easy
most of us
spend most of our days
deciding what to consume
in what order
and we consider it taxing
challenging
consume what you will
consume your freedom if you must
you are the wheelman
what you say
goes
congratulations
celebrate
and consume a bit more than usual
you deserve it
you just do what it takes
to keep desire at bay
moment to moment
because god knows
what it would do
if you didn't give in
or you couldn't give in
and satisfy your hunger
maybe
it would learn
to be quiet
i cannot go to sleep
unless i convince myself
i have suffered
a little
that day
good thing
the sun always rises
over the river of forgetfulness
otherwise
i'd have something to feel guilty about
tomorrow
i am afraid
to go to sleep
having accomplished nothing of consequence
today
for a while when i was a kid
i was afraid
to go to sleep
to let the day end
because i heard
that every day
another species
of plant or animal
goes extinct
on our planet
due to us
every day
i have lived
i have been complicit
in the destruction
in the murder death killing
of beings that i love
beings that time loved
and lost
when did our paradise
become a prison?
i was an impotent witness
as a child
and as a man
i am an impotent accomplice
i am afraid
to go to sleep
having accomplished nothing of consequence
today
i am growing tired
but if i give in
my daily consumption
will not have contributed
to anything worth counting
all i did today
was consume
our lives
are so easy
most of us
spend most of our days
deciding what to consume
in what order
and we consider it taxing
challenging
consume what you will
consume your freedom if you must
you are the wheelman
what you say
goes
congratulations
celebrate
and consume a bit more than usual
you deserve it
you just do what it takes
to keep desire at bay
moment to moment
because god knows
what it would do
if you didn't give in
or you couldn't give in
and satisfy your hunger
maybe
it would learn
to be quiet
i cannot go to sleep
unless i convince myself
i have suffered
a little
that day
good thing
the sun always rises
over the river of forgetfulness
otherwise
i'd have something to feel guilty about
tomorrow
No replies - reply
tick-tock
we are the time-bombs of doom
not just ours
but doom in general
for life on earth
we now know
what we are
but we still don't care
we are smart enough
to see the future
our inevitable doom
but we do not change
we smile and look the other way
run for your lives
every man for himself
look out for number one
consume or decline
get rich or die trying
tick-tock
we are the time-bombs of doom
not just ours
but doom in general
for life on earth
we now know
what we are
but we still don't care
we are smart enough
to see the future
our inevitable doom
but we do not change
we smile and look the other way
run for your lives
every man for himself
look out for number one
consume or decline
get rich or die trying
tick-tock
No replies - reply
searching for something
i was searching for something today...
i couldn't find it on tv...
i couldn't find it in consumption,
or pleasant company...
i couldn't find it in my books,
though there's much to find in there...
i couldn't find it in distractions,
or even the "fresh" air...
considering something is everywhere
it shouldn't be so hard to find...
"a man must be something more than just a man"
but designations make us blind...
so many things are unsatisfying
to the soul of the humble seeker,
we live in a world! acknowledge the world!
and how it is growing weaker...
nature's life-force withers around us
and we watch it while we have a drink,
we watch it when we go to work...
we watch, contribute, and do not think...
every action has a consequence...
that's easy to see on a small scale...
throw a mountain of coal into a fire,
and you'd better expect brimstone and hail...
the Earth! where has she gone? my love!
can your smiles heal her scars?
she'll never be as rich as she once was,
because we made her ours'.
i was searching for something today...
i couldn't find it on tv...
i couldn't find it in consumption,
or pleasant company...
i couldn't find it in my books,
though there's much to find in there...
i couldn't find it in distractions,
or even the "fresh" air...
considering something is everywhere
it shouldn't be so hard to find...
"a man must be something more than just a man"
but designations make us blind...
so many things are unsatisfying
to the soul of the humble seeker,
we live in a world! acknowledge the world!
and how it is growing weaker...
nature's life-force withers around us
and we watch it while we have a drink,
we watch it when we go to work...
we watch, contribute, and do not think...
every action has a consequence...
that's easy to see on a small scale...
throw a mountain of coal into a fire,
and you'd better expect brimstone and hail...
the Earth! where has she gone? my love!
can your smiles heal her scars?
she'll never be as rich as she once was,
because we made her ours'.
No replies - reply
rampant riddles taunt the thinker--
he knows that life is not a game,
but he is compelled to approach it as one...
knowledge is obtained like any sporting skill.
he practices thought unwittingly,
indiscriminately, as if each blood cell in his brain
was a different word.
the more he thought the more he had to think about,
what would he think if he knew no words?
what would he write if he couldn't think?
words in our minds, snow on the ground, life on earth.
the pieces may or may not fall where they may.
we have freedom, crude instincts and crude words,
and every yin has its yang.
why ask a question?
he knows that life is not a game,
but he is compelled to approach it as one...
knowledge is obtained like any sporting skill.
he practices thought unwittingly,
indiscriminately, as if each blood cell in his brain
was a different word.
the more he thought the more he had to think about,
what would he think if he knew no words?
what would he write if he couldn't think?
words in our minds, snow on the ground, life on earth.
the pieces may or may not fall where they may.
we have freedom, crude instincts and crude words,
and every yin has its yang.
why ask a question?
No replies - reply
english
english crawls and stumbles through my mind
in unconscious, intractable consciousness...
"the present" makes time and thought and english seem real
seem possessable, seem unique,
but all the words are already there, arranged perfectly
if they are viewed from the right perspective...
any arrangement of words i could choose would be imperfect
and incomplete...
do we seek emotions in our words or reason?
reason is probably just a mix of emotions,
just a mixture of words coming one at a time...
one word one thought one emotion one discovery at one time,
one world one language in my head,
one moment-- now gone-- one past;
one truth, one reality, one fate.
words in english cannot express how little we know...
will the void always be a void?
will english ever circumscribe reality?
will justice reign in our hearts and minds?
what is reason's gospel?
what is english's most honest form?
english stumbles in circles through our minds--
teach it to travel in a straight line--
always on the cusp of the unknown,
never on the known for long,
we arose from and will descend into mystery...
we hurtle through thoughts, and space, and time,
catching whatever words we may
because we're afraid of the mystery of wordlessness.
english crawls and stumbles through my mind
in unconscious, intractable consciousness...
"the present" makes time and thought and english seem real
seem possessable, seem unique,
but all the words are already there, arranged perfectly
if they are viewed from the right perspective...
any arrangement of words i could choose would be imperfect
and incomplete...
do we seek emotions in our words or reason?
reason is probably just a mix of emotions,
just a mixture of words coming one at a time...
one word one thought one emotion one discovery at one time,
one world one language in my head,
one moment-- now gone-- one past;
one truth, one reality, one fate.
words in english cannot express how little we know...
will the void always be a void?
will english ever circumscribe reality?
will justice reign in our hearts and minds?
what is reason's gospel?
what is english's most honest form?
english stumbles in circles through our minds--
teach it to travel in a straight line--
always on the cusp of the unknown,
never on the known for long,
we arose from and will descend into mystery...
we hurtle through thoughts, and space, and time,
catching whatever words we may
because we're afraid of the mystery of wordlessness.
No replies - reply
who knows?
humanity is self-interested, only self-interested,
believing Nature cannot augment us in any way...
and having not the courtesy and good sense
to methodically explore Her wonders,
we do not know Her wonders.
we assume our prideful perceptions,
can perceive reality...
we play our parts in staged elections
and call it democracy...
but that is a system developed for those
who know themselves a bit.
we don't know what to desire, what to oppose,
and to judge a man-- who's fit?
principles are ways to the truth,
and ways into delusion;
don't equate the universe,
to your petty profusion.
humanity is self-interested, only self-interested,
believing Nature cannot augment us in any way...
and having not the courtesy and good sense
to methodically explore Her wonders,
we do not know Her wonders.
humanity is self-interested, only self-interested,
believing Nature cannot augment us in any way...
and having not the courtesy and good sense
to methodically explore Her wonders,
we do not know Her wonders.
we assume our prideful perceptions,
can perceive reality...
we play our parts in staged elections
and call it democracy...
but that is a system developed for those
who know themselves a bit.
we don't know what to desire, what to oppose,
and to judge a man-- who's fit?
principles are ways to the truth,
and ways into delusion;
don't equate the universe,
to your petty profusion.
humanity is self-interested, only self-interested,
believing Nature cannot augment us in any way...
and having not the courtesy and good sense
to methodically explore Her wonders,
we do not know Her wonders.
No replies - reply
now is the time the truth must awake;
we are failing the test and living a lie;
we ignore in our minds what makes our hearts ache;
we just consume and multiply.
we call it a life, and make it a game,
think of what we know and what we do...
we laud that upon which we should heap shame,
on "democracy" we haven't got a clue.
our ways haven't changed in thousands of years,
only the extent of discovery
don't mistake a life with no fears,
for a life of civility.
we have no captains, in captains' colours,
they follow fools who follow greed--
which makes their vision ever duller--
obese kings in want and need.
we are failing the test and living a lie;
we ignore in our minds what makes our hearts ache;
we just consume and multiply.
we call it a life, and make it a game,
think of what we know and what we do...
we laud that upon which we should heap shame,
on "democracy" we haven't got a clue.
our ways haven't changed in thousands of years,
only the extent of discovery
don't mistake a life with no fears,
for a life of civility.
we have no captains, in captains' colours,
they follow fools who follow greed--
which makes their vision ever duller--
obese kings in want and need.
No replies - reply
carpe diem
where is the line between reality and delusion?
life taunts us with distractions and drowns us in confusion...
it imprisons us in time, compelling us to ACT...
carpe diem, DO all you can DO, and bolly the impact...
time's a wastin-- LET it go, and watch it fade away...
that is its nature, ours as well, we were made to work that way...
we are mortal, life is not-- it is bound to time undying,
our parts seem petty, but even so, why shouldn't we be trying
to preserve and protect what has been fundamental
in every respect to LIFE monumental?
if one STOPS to think, research or inquire,
one's mountains of questions pile higher and higher...
the resources we share are much to admire,
but we still learn our lessons from myths and church choirs...
science doesn't answer ALL and end ALL to send you off to sleep,
but it's honest and it's HUMAN, imperfect, but still deep...
EVERYTHING is a THEORY to students of objectivity,
dynamism is their domain, a fluxing relativity...
we underestimate the breadth of what we do NOT understand,
and as infants we reside in personal wonderlands...
what we believe will not affect, the immutable laws of THE WAY,
parameters exist in this universe of ours, so answers aren't too far away...
harmony is the first key-- on it we build a legacy,
make of the world a nursery, for ALL those in life's family...
unite the good and teach the bad, unleash the power of One mind,
united with your siblings stand, before the riddles of mankind...
where is the line between reality and delusion?
life taunts us with distractions and drowns us in confusion...
it imprisons us in time, compelling us to ACT...
carpe diem, DO all you can DO, and bolly the impact...
time's a wastin-- LET it go, and watch it fade away...
that is its nature, ours as well, we were made to work that way...
we are mortal, life is not-- it is bound to time undying,
our parts seem petty, but even so, why shouldn't we be trying
to preserve and protect what has been fundamental
in every respect to LIFE monumental?
if one STOPS to think, research or inquire,
one's mountains of questions pile higher and higher...
the resources we share are much to admire,
but we still learn our lessons from myths and church choirs...
science doesn't answer ALL and end ALL to send you off to sleep,
but it's honest and it's HUMAN, imperfect, but still deep...
EVERYTHING is a THEORY to students of objectivity,
dynamism is their domain, a fluxing relativity...
we underestimate the breadth of what we do NOT understand,
and as infants we reside in personal wonderlands...
what we believe will not affect, the immutable laws of THE WAY,
parameters exist in this universe of ours, so answers aren't too far away...
harmony is the first key-- on it we build a legacy,
make of the world a nursery, for ALL those in life's family...
unite the good and teach the bad, unleash the power of One mind,
united with your siblings stand, before the riddles of mankind...
No replies - reply
more
upon first glancing into modern poetry
modern poetry
pisses me off
"... lavender moonbeams
caress black and white memories
the questral sings
my heart's desire
an explosion of deep blue
and i am in love again..."
modern poets
should learn
to shut the fuck up
if they have nothing to say
i was surprised when i found
someone like bukowski
could actually
get published
then i started to sniff around
and i noticed
that modern poetry
sucks
ass
that modern poets
are
fruit-cakes
by and large
my god
how could one not want to wretch
reading modern poetry?
my god
what has become
of our mainstream?
we are not doomed
just because
we still fight
we are doomed
because
the mainstream expects us to fight
my god
revulsion on the one side
shame on the other
stupidity all-encompassing
my god
it is almost
enough
to dissuade me from writing altogether
i hadn't realized it had come to this
i read too many classics
our poets are as fake as our presidents
as empty
as selfish
as shameful
as full of bliss
i cannot stomach
a career
surrounded by such idiocy
sheer idiocy
unforgiveable idiocy
who publishes these people?
who reads them with relish?
wow
i keep reading more...
why do some poets
think every muddled encounter
with muddled characters
is compelling?
"... Lisa's dress moved like a moth
amorphous, spontaneous, encircling her light
i smiled at her, in awe,
in youthful anticipation
green
then i pulled out onto interstate 79A
to head down to macdonalds
to grab a couple of burgers
and probably some fries
as lisa's lipstick
danced a nervous tango
in my rear-view mirror...
there are many
pretty colours
and other desirable things
in this varathane world...
i like to collect as many pretty things as possible
and ride with them in my galliant car
through tangerine sunsets
and sleepy pastel sunrises
and then, ideally,
i like to fuck those pretty things
i like to fuck them with my pretty cock
he means the world to me
he is the measure of my life
my holy grail
without him
lisa's rosy red velvet lips
wouldn't dance so excitingly
so austerely, so tangibly
and her dress wouldn't seem such a compelling mystery
and her eyes of sky blue
wouldn't be my master, my motivation
as the lavender hills hyponotize our sensations
we are alive in reds in blues and greens
but we are so, so yellow
too
never forget
that we are yellow too, and silver and gold
moonbeams
me and lisa
and interstate 79a
we were lost and found
that summer
that lavender, obnoxious summer,
ah! to be young in amarillo!"
publish that cocksuckers
my god
some of the words
these new poets use
are truly obscene
i cannot even mock or mimic them
because i do not know what they are
or what they mean
and i do not care to know
ever
fucked-up words
don't equate to credentials
to me
wow
still reading more...
and now i have a question
why is every area
of human endeavor
saturated with shit?
when i was young
i assumed
that polititians were an exception
exceptionally bad people
but not reflective of the general population
but now i know
who it is
who votes these cocksuckers into office
over and over
it's our false poets
and false poetry readers
give them a fighting chance!
give them sincerity!
(and a bit of clarity for the love of god!)
i used to think i was convoluted
too dramatic
too analytical
to make sense
but if this is what the mainstream takes for sense
for eloquence
if the people of the world want
lavender escapades in grey paradigms of obsequiousness
they can suck my cock
this is
of course
too coarse
to be a poem
in itself
this is
an idea
an observation
a critique
that has an adequate amount of words
to be classified as a poem
but it too
has too much opinion
uncensored emotion
uh... "red" emotion
when everybody who knows anything
knows
that the only true poems are calm and blue
naturally
(now, i've got to explain this one a little... what i'm saying is that all the modern poetry i've read seems to simply be an (arguably) eloquent expression of good old-fashioned bodily lust/desire... c'est sa)
modern poetry
pisses me off
"... lavender moonbeams
caress black and white memories
the questral sings
my heart's desire
an explosion of deep blue
and i am in love again..."
modern poets
should learn
to shut the fuck up
if they have nothing to say
i was surprised when i found
someone like bukowski
could actually
get published
then i started to sniff around
and i noticed
that modern poetry
sucks
ass
that modern poets
are
fruit-cakes
by and large
my god
how could one not want to wretch
reading modern poetry?
my god
what has become
of our mainstream?
we are not doomed
just because
we still fight
we are doomed
because
the mainstream expects us to fight
my god
revulsion on the one side
shame on the other
stupidity all-encompassing
my god
it is almost
enough
to dissuade me from writing altogether
i hadn't realized it had come to this
i read too many classics
our poets are as fake as our presidents
as empty
as selfish
as shameful
as full of bliss
i cannot stomach
a career
surrounded by such idiocy
sheer idiocy
unforgiveable idiocy
who publishes these people?
who reads them with relish?
wow
i keep reading more...
why do some poets
think every muddled encounter
with muddled characters
is compelling?
"... Lisa's dress moved like a moth
amorphous, spontaneous, encircling her light
i smiled at her, in awe,
in youthful anticipation
green
then i pulled out onto interstate 79A
to head down to macdonalds
to grab a couple of burgers
and probably some fries
as lisa's lipstick
danced a nervous tango
in my rear-view mirror...
there are many
pretty colours
and other desirable things
in this varathane world...
i like to collect as many pretty things as possible
and ride with them in my galliant car
through tangerine sunsets
and sleepy pastel sunrises
and then, ideally,
i like to fuck those pretty things
i like to fuck them with my pretty cock
he means the world to me
he is the measure of my life
my holy grail
without him
lisa's rosy red velvet lips
wouldn't dance so excitingly
so austerely, so tangibly
and her dress wouldn't seem such a compelling mystery
and her eyes of sky blue
wouldn't be my master, my motivation
as the lavender hills hyponotize our sensations
we are alive in reds in blues and greens
but we are so, so yellow
too
never forget
that we are yellow too, and silver and gold
moonbeams
me and lisa
and interstate 79a
we were lost and found
that summer
that lavender, obnoxious summer,
ah! to be young in amarillo!"
publish that cocksuckers
my god
some of the words
these new poets use
are truly obscene
i cannot even mock or mimic them
because i do not know what they are
or what they mean
and i do not care to know
ever
fucked-up words
don't equate to credentials
to me
wow
still reading more...
and now i have a question
why is every area
of human endeavor
saturated with shit?
when i was young
i assumed
that polititians were an exception
exceptionally bad people
but not reflective of the general population
but now i know
who it is
who votes these cocksuckers into office
over and over
it's our false poets
and false poetry readers
give them a fighting chance!
give them sincerity!
(and a bit of clarity for the love of god!)
i used to think i was convoluted
too dramatic
too analytical
to make sense
but if this is what the mainstream takes for sense
for eloquence
if the people of the world want
lavender escapades in grey paradigms of obsequiousness
they can suck my cock
this is
of course
too coarse
to be a poem
in itself
this is
an idea
an observation
a critique
that has an adequate amount of words
to be classified as a poem
but it too
has too much opinion
uncensored emotion
uh... "red" emotion
when everybody who knows anything
knows
that the only true poems are calm and blue
naturally
(now, i've got to explain this one a little... what i'm saying is that all the modern poetry i've read seems to simply be an (arguably) eloquent expression of good old-fashioned bodily lust/desire... c'est sa)
No replies - reply
more
Tags: poem
poemhmmm...
doesn't not knowing
make you want to know?
would not being make you want to be--
assuming you could want at all?
mystery cannot be seized
only pursued
but it cannot be chased down
it must be tricked
sneak up on it
by letting it sneak up on you
when it surprises you
surprise it
by recognizing it
trust me
it will be humbled
as my mind purges
i type
recording
every drop
every word
anything distinguishable from nothing
why do i record?
to illustrate a point
i am akin to everyone
and i am a fool
on that much we can all agree...
like a chamaeleon
i borrow your perspective
or is it just a part of mine
and yours?
my rational side
is full of invective
we die like swine
on wisdom's shores
[ha-ha-ha
shit like that
is my idea
of humour
that is the kind of man i am]
is there a part of all of us in each of us?
there is.
what we are
is etched in the stars
who we are
is what we choose to believe
but we all believe
upon close inspection
we all believe some of the same stuff
example:
we all wish that
a: no harm comes to our mothers
or, in rare cases,
b: that we had mothers who weren't crack-heads,
something along those lines anyhow
and that is just one of many things we
all
share
yes
we can be quite repulsive
that is why we should give each other some goddam space
nature rarely invokes revulsion or anger
explore it
but leave it
in peace
preserve it
your grand-kids will need it
we are not getting any smarter
anytime soon
it is our refuge
the only home outside our minds
the only outside
it is an unmatched harmony
augment it
join in
do not smother it
(bolly me-- even when i try to play bukowski i still spout my romantic-nihilist propoganda... shitty)
we are not tending
to our old wounds.
we're frantic in our race for glory
forgetting
to tend
to our old wounds
they will not heal
until we stop
to take a breather
to rest
recover
rebuild
the wounded
should not toil
unless they have to
we all are wounded
deficient
let us learn to educate
to guide
to inspire
we need leaders
we're getting lawyers
what a
massive
head wound
let's learn to use our brains
before
we learn to blow someone's brains out
collect thoughts
there they go
why are you ignoring them?
they are as real as anything you've ever heard
can you hear them?
clearly?
listen
always listen
sleep on it
doesn't not knowing
make you want to know?
would not being make you want to be--
assuming you could want at all?
mystery cannot be seized
only pursued
but it cannot be chased down
it must be tricked
sneak up on it
by letting it sneak up on you
when it surprises you
surprise it
by recognizing it
trust me
it will be humbled
as my mind purges
i type
recording
every drop
every word
anything distinguishable from nothing
why do i record?
to illustrate a point
i am akin to everyone
and i am a fool
on that much we can all agree...
like a chamaeleon
i borrow your perspective
or is it just a part of mine
and yours?
my rational side
is full of invective
we die like swine
on wisdom's shores
[ha-ha-ha
shit like that
is my idea
of humour
that is the kind of man i am]
is there a part of all of us in each of us?
there is.
what we are
is etched in the stars
who we are
is what we choose to believe
but we all believe
upon close inspection
we all believe some of the same stuff
example:
we all wish that
a: no harm comes to our mothers
or, in rare cases,
b: that we had mothers who weren't crack-heads,
something along those lines anyhow
and that is just one of many things we
all
share
yes
we can be quite repulsive
that is why we should give each other some goddam space
nature rarely invokes revulsion or anger
explore it
but leave it
in peace
preserve it
your grand-kids will need it
we are not getting any smarter
anytime soon
it is our refuge
the only home outside our minds
the only outside
it is an unmatched harmony
augment it
join in
do not smother it
(bolly me-- even when i try to play bukowski i still spout my romantic-nihilist propoganda... shitty)
we are not tending
to our old wounds.
we're frantic in our race for glory
forgetting
to tend
to our old wounds
they will not heal
until we stop
to take a breather
to rest
recover
rebuild
the wounded
should not toil
unless they have to
we all are wounded
deficient
let us learn to educate
to guide
to inspire
we need leaders
we're getting lawyers
what a
massive
head wound
let's learn to use our brains
before
we learn to blow someone's brains out
collect thoughts
there they go
why are you ignoring them?
they are as real as anything you've ever heard
can you hear them?
clearly?
listen
always listen
sleep on it
No replies - reply
Profile
Recent Visitors
Calendar